Thursday, May 1, 2008

A Utopia is a Utopia is a Utopia

Oh my, how I love my job some days!!! The 10th graders I teach have been working on Utopian projects for about a month now. We read Anthem by Ayn Rand and discussed at length what it takes to have great religious, economical, education, legal, and governmental systems. Then the students had to formulate their ideas to create their own Utopias, present them to the class, and see who would actually want to join (the winning Utopia gets a big prize). As these kids presented I was trying so hard not to die with laughter. Some of the things they said were just priceless!

"I will have religious freedom in my Utopia..." pause "of course, cults that commit mass suicide on a certain date will be banned." (said in deadpan seriousness)

"In my Utopia the President has to have at least a Masters Degree in economics and sociology so they know what's going on."

"In my Utopia the main punishment will be that a random hand will be chosen to be cut off....and no prosthetic limbs will be sold anywhere in my city."

"My Utopia is called 'Hybrid-e-a' a place where Capitalism and Communism come together in a happy medium."

"Men will be the workers, women will take care of the children." (and yes, I did give this kid quite a hard time after that statement!)

"My Utopia has a Three Strike Rule...after three strikes, you are out!"

"The leader must be female. I am tired of war. She'll be like one big mother."

"Utopias can only exist in space....and like, cuz there won't be no prison, you'll just release the bad people into the atmosphere."

"In my Utopia the leader will be picked by doing an American Gladiator match, cause I don't want a whimpy leader."

"My Utopia will be considered perfect because I will brainwash them all."

"The name of my Utopia is '24 Hour Party People'."

"Basically, my Utopia will drug people into being polite."

"No deity religions can exist in my Utopia."

"When people are bad they will be put in a big titanium box and shocked...and this will be in public, so no one else will want to break the rules."

"My Utopia will have jungle gyms for adults."

"In my Utopia, everyone will be vegatarian...except for Turkey, cause Thanksgiving is really cool."

"In my Utopia Starbucks will be owned by the governments so it is not so expensive."

"In my Utopia people need to care what they look like, I am tired of ugly, lazy people."

After today, I believe in Whitney Houston's words even more. The children are our future.


Alisa said...

How cool are these? I now think you have the best job ever. I would have loved to be there.

arbee said...

Those made me laugh! It's nice to see some of them have their priorities... And I love that one of them would pick the leader by doing an American Gladiator match. How funny is that?!

I love it when I have those kinds of days at my work...unfortunately my "I love my job!" days are not nearly so hilarious! :D

Olivia said...

It's official, I'll never be able to be a teacher...I'd have been rolling on the floor in laughter...major props to you for keeping a straight the way, in my Utopia, everyone will be given a daily dosage of chocolate...

solidcommagirl said...

Someone has been watching too much Battlestar Galactica. "Send them out the airlock!"

Alisa said...

Last night I was reciting to Kevin some of your students' Utopia comments. I told him about the one "The men will be the workers, and the women will take care of the children."

Kevin said, "Yes, we call that Utopia 'Orem.'"

Gustav said...

Dear DArcy

I love this post.

Children's ideas are so fresh and bold and unencumbered by mediocrity.

I would be interested in what you view as Utopia.

Marie said...

This is fantastic! I love your students. Almost you persuade me to be a teacher.

I hope that kid didn't mean "deity religions" because I absolutely agree that all diets that double as pseudo-religions should be banned. They are so very creepy.

Marianne said...

Don't you just LOVE days like that!?!!? Actually makes being a teacher even that much better!! Seriously entertaining:)

HappyWifeHappyLife said...

I love the one about it being mandatory for the President to have a degree in Economics and Sociology.... now THAT is one smart kid to come up with that!

Anonymous said...

WOW! Good stuff.

I love the idea of communism and capitalism coming together. And that of the leader having to have a master's degree in sociology and ecomomics. Now, wouldn't THAT be rather refreshing? :)

Sugar said...

Love the ugly lazy people student. I can just imagine how much mirror time this one gets. Prisoners being set off into space? That would help with prison overcrowding, wouldn't it? Drugging people to be polite... hmmmm... isn't that what Prozac is for?

I remember telling people what I thought without being afraid. Ahh youth...

Jaime said...

Hysterical! I love it. I would've had a really hard time with the straight face.