Friday, October 10, 2008

Come Together, Right Now

(Family Photo 1994)

Yesterday during lunch I took out my phone to see several texts and messages awaiting me (which NEVER happens, I'm just NOT a phone person)

dad's been in an accident....

hospital....

broken back....

paralyzed.....

Wow. How do you go on after that? How is it that everything can change in a second? Life is powerful. When I left my class to my awesome principal (who took over in a matter of seconds) and rushed to the hospital, shaking, trying to tell myself that everything would be alright..I just thought of my family. I thought of what this would do to my family. We only recently lost my favorite Uncle, a man who has been in my life almost as much as my father has. My dad is now his age. My dad's health isn't that great. What could my family handle?

I rushed into the ER and saw it full of all my loved ones. My nieces and nephews looking scared, my sister April coming to hug me. Audra and her small daughter in her arms. Brooke just recovering from surgery. David with tears in his eyes. LOVE.


SO MUCH LOVE.

(D'Arcy, David, and April...Christmas 1996)

Everything IS alright. The doctors, who told us to prepare for the worst and wouldn't give us details, finally let us know. Bruises and broken ribs. Swelling and tenderness, but spinal cord in tact. He will be alright. My brother-in-law gave my father a priesthood blessing, and it was amazing. And it softened me a bit ( I said a bit!). Once the good news was given, it was like we couldn't leave each other. We just wanted to sit, no where to go, just sit by my father's side and have us all be together.

Now, my family has had it's struggles. A LOT of struggles. It's had problems. It still does. I was wondering if my brother would even come to the hospital because he usually doesn't put family first. But, he was the first one there. All five of us kids got to my mother and father's side within the hour. That's pretty amazing. I wish I could take the time to tell you how beautiful a sight it was. I wish I could let you know the struggles that my family has faced. The heartaches, the fights, the distance, the addictions, the hurt feelings, the misunderstandings, the battles against depression. Often it is as if all five of us children came from different countries and we all speak our own language that none of the others can ever understand. But it is nice to know that in a crisis...we all speak the language of love.


All of us stayed at my parents house last night, late into the evening. Eating dinner together and helping clean house. I found an old photo album from 1996. I was starting my second year of college and found so many fun photos that I scanned a few to put up here. I am STILL in touch with all of these girls. Jenn, Stacey, Emily, Holly.....these memories are for you! They were another family for me for many years.

Lest you doubt my past claims about being the apartment freak at 6 feet tall and the only blonde...here's a photo to prove it. ALL of these girls got engaged or married within two years of this photo. It almost looks like a set of quintuplets and me (right Jenn?) That's Jenn in the plaid skirt.


Yep, Holly and I REALLY did reenact scenes from Jane Austen. This is a scene we would do where I was Emma and Holly was Harriet. It was just an excuse to do my hair big and speak in a British accent...and drink tea. Yep, my cheeks are that red and always will be. It's my curse.



The best girlfriends a girl could have, still are.




So go out, give you family or friends a call. Tell someone you love them. Remember how blessed you are. Look into the eyes of the person next to you and really see them. Slow down. Breath. Live. Dream. Hope. 

41 comments:

Steve and Jenn Fletcher said...

Ahh...my eyes are on fire!!! Ack! How could I ever think I looked GOOD in that horrible PINK skirt???

Super nice post, D'Arce. It is really amazing how families can come together in a crisis, huh? I am glad your dad is doing okay. Give your family my best.

Stina said...

I'm sending best wishes for a speedy recovery for your dad. I am so glad your family has been able to come together to support each other during this scary time. It really is amazing how quickly life can change and throw you things you could never anticipate. Take care of yourself and let me know if you need anything (or need to reschedule Monday).

Tender Mercies said...

Oh, D'Arcy, it's moments like this that really make you realize what's really important. Thanks for posting. I hope the very best comes of this! Your family will be in my prayers.

jomama said...

i am so so glad that your dad is going to recover, d'arcy! my thoughts and prayers are with you right now. i'm glad your whole family could be there together. it really does make a difference to have everyone there, doesn't it?
i love you!

Ruahines said...

Kia ora D'arcy,
My thoughts are with you and your family. Glad you are surrounded by such warmth and love. Family is family. Kia kaha, remain strong.
Aroha,
Robb

Texas MacLeans said...

D'Arce,
You know I am not much of a comment girl but you are always in my thoughts. I am glad that your dad is going to be OK and that your family was all able to be together. I know that makes such a difference especially now that I am away form my family and there has been many times when I wish I could be near them. I know what you mean, that inspite of all the differences we have as a family sometimes, we still have a love for each other that is deeper than we know until we think we might lose it with that person. I can't stand my sisters sometimes, but I love them more than life itself.
Thanks for the pictures, Those days seem long ago but at the same time it seems like it was yesterday. I will always cherish those times, they were some of the best in my life, as cheesy as that sounds, it really was.
Hang in there D'Arce and I hope your dad conitues to heal quickly.

Alisa said...

D'Arcy, I read this and was just so worried. I'm sending my best vibes to your dad right now for his recovery.

You look gorgeous in those pictures. Ah! The height. I always wanted to be a tall Amazon - graceful, but potentially dangerous (I lied on me driver's license to be 1" taller when I was 16 and hoped I would grow to 5'9", but it didn't happen). And that hair. You know what to do with it.

Jen (SLC) said...

D'arcy, I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I'm glad he'll be okay, although broken ribs are very much not fun. You and your family are in my thoughts.

Sugar said...

Oh D'Arcy, I hope you and your family are just feeling so much love and relief right now.

It's so scary when someone that's always been there suddenly might not be... or isn't. It's harder still when you left things unsaid.

Tonight, I was grieving the loss of my father who passed away when I was 26. My step-father and I haven't visited in over a year, so I suppose I'm grieving both of my fathers. Reading this post made me just so thankful that your father is okay. I don't know... I just needed somebody's dad to be okay tonight...

G said...

I'm so glad things look hopeful, what a terrifying thing to go through. You and your family have my best wishes.

and what a beautiful post about your family, and friends. thanks for sharing it with us.

G said...

(and your rosy cheeks are FABULOUS!)
:)

mapelba said...

Glad to hear your father will be okay.

That, and you're beautiful drinking your tea.

Got Bombshell? said...

Wow. I am really glad your dad will be okay. And it's true, sometimes it's hard to realize what you have until you almost lose it. I know I take too much for granted every day.

D'Arcy said...

Jenn--did you notice? I got Stacey to comment!!! That has been a goal of mine, I thought maybe the puppies would do it, but then I figured I might have to actually post about Target to get a response.

But I finally thought let's post pictures of us in the 90s with all our big hair and pastel clothing! It worked!

D'Arcy said...

Stina--thank you friend. On top of everything, i am super sick and don't know if I will be able to hold baby Theo, so I am thinking we should reschedule Monday! I'll send an email.

D'Arcy said...

TM--so good to hear from you! I loved the latest photos of the newest addition to your family! You sister's kids certainly are the best dressed around!

D'Arcy said...

jo--I love you too. And miss you. I really want to get together.

D'Arcy said...

Robb. Thanks friend. My dad is doing much better! I can't see him this weekend because of my cold/cough, but I'll be around him as soon as I am able. I call everyday and the update is excellent!

D'Arcy said...

Stace, YES!!! I love that you commented! I loved those times too....slamming of the microwave door and all (you know I'll never let that one go, don't you!)

D'Arcy said...

Alisa,,

Thank you, I've learned to embrace my height now. I remember on my mission they used to call me The Viking Sister...I think I like Viking better than Amazon...i sound stronger or faster or something.

D'Arcy said...

jen--thanks so much. I have loved reading your blog lately. You are a wise woman and I can't wait until our next book club! And one of these days I want to meet Boo and Izzy in real life!

D'Arcy said...

Sugar, I am so touched. And let me tell you, I don't take my dad for granted at all. I've grown up in families where father's seem to die younger than they should. My own mother was only 16 when her father died of cancer. She was one of the oldest of 9 children on a poor farm in Idaho...let's talk about a tough childhood. She still talks about her father often enough that I feel like I know him, but it's not the same as actually knowing him. I have visited his grave every year and there is that connection.

Your words are beautiful, thank you.

D'Arcy said...

g---thanks. One thing about rosy cheeks, I sure fit in at the bars in Ireland!

D'Arcy said...

i should say "pubs" actually

D'Arcy said...

mapelba---YOU are the one that inspired me to put up some old photos. Every time I visit your blog I am amazed at the amount of captured history you are able to share with me.


And thank you.

D'Arcy said...

got bombshell--thank you! To think I was worrying about how all that rice pudding had made my pants a bit tight just that morning. It does put life into perspective.

Michelle said...

I like this post D'Arce. You're family will be in my prayers.

I hope you're feeling better soon.

Moonbird said...

Wow.

And wow some more.

Is that really us? That's me?!

these are great photos...and awesome memories. what a trip!

Rowena said...

Wow. I am glad your father will be okay. My uncle broke his neck and wore one of those Halo things for a while, but he's fine now... although he can't turn his head, really.

Family is such a strange thing. They can be so frustrating, but then sometimes, they feel like home.

I am still working on your painting. I'm sorry it's taking so long, I'm working out my policies at the same time. I will email you soon.

ophelia rising said...

D'Arcy, I'm so glad that your Dad will be okay. I'm thinking of you and your family, and sending my most loving thoughts.

Also, love to see the pictures! How great are they? You are one beautiful person!

Love to you, my friend. xoxo

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Beautiful post. So glad to hear you dad is going to be alright.

Gustav said...

Dear D'Arcy

I am relieved to hear your dad will be ok.

Hang in there. Events like this can bring family even closer together than before.

D'Arcy said...

michelle, moonbird--thank you!

D'Arcy said...

Rowena,

Take your time. The evolution of Flying Girl is an amazing thing for me to behold everyday.

And yes, family is home.

D'Arcy said...

ophelia, phsteacher, and Gustav--thank you so much! I am on my way to make dinner for my dad right now and spend the afternoon with him. He is healing.

barney6 said...

Hey D'Arcy: I'm so glad your dad is okay. This was a beautiful post. Funny how family can cause the most frustration and heartache and also the most joy and comfort, huh? Love, love, love all the pictures. You're gorgeous, btw, rosy cheeks and all.

Claire, said...

Wow, Heart wrenching story. I'm so grateful. We don't even have family close enough to see at the hospital if the business came down...

Jessica said...

D'Arcy
That sounds sooo scary. I'm glad your dad is okay. It's events like this that really put life in perspective, dont' they?

pavocavalry said...

good blog

smiles4u said...

I am so glad that your father is going to be alright. I have been gone from the blogaspere while gone for vacation so am playing catch up. This was a beautiful post and I loved reading how you all came together as a family no matter how much diversity there is or has been among you.

I loved the pictures too! Thank you for sharing and once again I am so glad that your dad is alright! I hope he is back to normal very soon! My thoughts and prayers will be with him and your family!

Boquinha said...

Beautiful post, D'Arcy. I'm glad to hear that your Dad is doing well. It's a beautiful post.