The Best Thing About the Oscars (Part Deux)

1. HUGH JACKMAN. HUGH JACKMAN. The man is an Australian who played an Australian in a film called Australia. If that is not acting range, I don't know what is. PLUS we got to see him do what he does best, sing and dance, tap and woo, and just be Hugh. And while most love it when he's all muscled up and kicking ass, I just love to see his sentimental dreamy side in a coat and tails.

2. BEN STILLER's impersonation of the freaky sleaky Joaquin Phoenix. "I just don't want to be the funny man anymore." Too bad Natalie Portman isn't as good at comedy as Ben, but it was still a good laugh.

3. Anne Hathaway's dress and VOICE! Oh, her and Hugh really pulled that number off delightfully. It's still depressing to me that because of conflict schedules Anne wasn't able to be in The Phantom of the Opera and we are stuck forever with Emmy Rossum.

4. The way the camera kept focusing on Brad and Angelina the whole time that Jennifer Aniston was presenting. Very tacky Academy, very tacky.

5. The new way of personalizing the presentations was simply moving. Having past oscar winners come out and give indivdualized recognition to each of the nominees was such an AMAZING idea that I can't believe they hadn't done it before.

6. The entire cast of SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE. If that's not indication of the law of attraction, I seriously don't know what is. I am so glad a happy, moving movie actually won this year (what with gory and depressing The Departed and No Country for Old Men winning the past two years.)

7. LET'S JUST SAY IT ALL TOGETHER NOW: THE MUSICAL IS BACK!!! What great numbers! I loved it!

8. I did miss having each of the musicians actually play the nominated songs. I missed it so much that I acutally missed the part where someone won for that? I can't even remember who it was? Not memorable at all!

9. Tilda Swenson is still as freaky looking and freaky dressing as ever. What will it be like when her eyes are no longer PEIRCING into mine with an intensity that burns me to the core??

10. THE FASHION!!! People played it safe and classy this year. And while I always like seeing a few crazies to make things interesting, it's also nice when all the women and men (wait a second, Mickey Rourke DID give us some eye candy! Oh yeah, and seriously PSH? You COULDN'T remove the beanie for the Oscars? Seriously...) are flawless.

Tops on my list were always and forever Nicole Kidman, she can do no wrong in my book (and I TOTALLY want to do my hair like that!) Viola Davis was stunning. Penelope Cruz's vintage dress was breathtaking. I also like Marisa Tomei and I just love Kate Winslet...even if her hair was a bit helmety.

P.S. --Sophia Loren, I can't find a photo of you right now. But you officially scare the shit out of me. Officially official.

P.P.S.--Kate when your dad whistled so that you could know where he was, that was seriously awesome and kind of choked me up a bit.

%@!*&%#!!!!!!

I just realized that the Golden Globes were on tonight. Yeah, you see what time I am posting this? I MISSED THEM?!? How did that happen?!!!??? 

Did anyone I know, in this vicinity, DVR it or TiVo or any of those other rad items that I don't have? I'll make it worth your while. I really will. Seriously, I will. I know people. I have connections. 

I miss the Girls!!!

So I have been thinking all weekend about Rand, objectivism, egoism, altruism, religion, and other pretty deep topics, yet, when I woke this morning I just had a terrible sense of how much I miss Lorelai and Rory!!! I know, a post on collectivism verses the individual will soon be coming, but for now, let me just say that I miss the girls of Gilmore.

I became slightly addicted to GG when I came down with one of the most horrific illnesses of my life in New York City. I was unable to walk or sit up and I had to get a cab, lay in the back, and ask them to take me to the ER as I was dying. The cabbie barely batted an eyelash and sped with alacrity to the NYU emergency facilities. If he would have offered to help me into the actual building we might be married by now. So, in recovery, my roommate Becky introduced me to GG. This was 2004 and Gilmore Girls had just started it's forth season. I watched season 1 straight through in about 2.5 days. I credit it with my continued desire to live. Ever since then I have been an addict. Yes, hello, my name is D'Arcy and I am addicted to Gilmore Girls and Hagen-Daz Chocolate Peanut Butter ice-cream.

Gilmore Girls taught me about the Sex Pistols, Bill Moyers and the Power of Myth (how else would you want to spend spring break?), the Pixies, Norman Mailer, Elsa Clench, Merlin Perkins, and whether I want a "Nick & Nora" or a "Sid & Nancy" type of love.

Man, there is just an empty void that I can't shake every Tuesday night at 7 pm

Now, can I get to the really crazy part. I actually had a notebook that I would write down particularly funny phrases that I wanted to remember. I KNOW!!! It's insanely weird and wrong, but just read on, I promise you'll laugh.


HERE IT IS---SOME OF THE FUNNIEST LINES FROM THE WORLD OF GILMORE:


"While He is being sexy--he's also being grammatically correct." --Rory

"I know I've always dreamed that a boy would give me a really confusing Czechoslovakian novel." --Lane

"I guess this goes on the 'Boy Was I Wrong List' right below gauchos, but above the Flashdance phase." --Lorelai

"I'm afraid once your heart is involved it all comes out in moron." --Lorelai

"Stop her!"
"How?!"
"Show her a picture of Nick Nolte's mug shot!"

"Bob Hope is laughing in heaven, but I'm not." --Rory

"Let me check my spinster calendar..." --Lorelai

"I'm smiling because you're crazy and that's what you do to crazy people to keep them calm." --Rory

Logan: You're special, Rory.
Rory: Like "stop eating the paste" kind of special?

"Because Rory, when I read my autobiography I don't want to be bored!" --Paris

"There is no use for lava lamps unless you are on drugs." --Emily Gilmore

"You once told me you loved 'Saved by the Bell', what can be more humiliating than that?" --Lorelai

And Finally---Hep Alien's Finest Moment:

Zach: Yeah. Dave, you're a Christian. So what? That's cool.
Brian: It's nothing to hide.
Zach: Christians can still rock.
Dave: They can?
Lane: Yeah, yeah, Dave. Christians can still rock, don't hide it.
Zach: Marshall Stacks don't know Christians from atheists.
Dave: Gosh, I just wasn't sure if you guys would be accepting of my devoutness.
Brian: Dave, it's a part of you, and we think you're cool, so it's cool.
Dave: Great. Thanks, guys.
Zach: But no way are we playing Creed, man.
Dave: Oh, no, of course not.
Zach: Or Amy Grant. That's where we draw the line.

The Best things about the Oscars......

1. Was imagining that that short little Jew was my husband, or my lover, or anything where I can spend hours upon hours adoring him. I love Jon Stewart in an inexplicable way....his joke about Titler alone melts my cold heart.

2. Tilda Swenson's evil eye....she frightens me and so does her stylist. I have no desire to see Michael Clayton, I about fell asleep in the previews....so I can't say much about her apparent talent.....I just keep coming back to those eyes....

3. Um, who invited Billy Ray's daughter to THE OSCARS!!!!!! No people! No! Ratings going down, down, down!!!!! I have an achey-breaky heart from this!!!

4. Anne Hathaway's perfect red dress....worn with a ponytail. A girl who can pull off this amazingly girly dress and look all dewey and innocent and pull off a ponytail at the same time is a girl I like...and apparently so does her mate...look at the pride he is taking in working that carpet!

5. Colin Farrell looking all drugged up and messy again and almost falling as he slipped his way to the podium. That's always a good time.

6. Tom Hank's botox job. Daniel Day's brown shoes and black tux...along with Rebecca Miller's huge circumference of jewels on the center of her bosom and were those red bows on her shoulders?? I am trying to imagine in what type of lighting this dress was chosen? I now want Daniel, Rebecca, Tim, and Helena to throw a party together--imagine that! I must add, lest you think me cruel, that DDL is perhaps one of the most eloquent people on the planet. If he would have said to me what he said when even accepting an Oscar, I'd marry him. Ok, we all know I'd marry him anyway, but being eloquent helps!!!



7. The most stunning Nicole Kidman....always taller than her spouse, poor dear, but does she know how to wear a strand of diamonds!! I'd like to be her, just for a day.


8. That darling French actress who came dressed like Ariel from Little Mermaid. She was so sweet. "Thank you life! Thank you love!!" Heaven knows I'd say the same in French if I were almost speechless. In fact, I will.... "Merci La Vie! Merci L'Amour!!!"










9. JAVIER BARDEM--------JAVIER BARDEM---------JAVIER BARDEM----I had sweet dreams about JAVIER BARDEM------Who, if you asked me, looked exceptionally like Jeffery Dean Morgan....I'll post pictures, don't worry....seriously, they could be twins right? Oh, Denny....why did you have to die!!??!!!??







10. The absolute highlight of the evening, the one thing I ended up really caring about was that Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova would win the Oscar for song. And they did!!! Art is alive!!! Have hope!!! You poor Dubliners.....you will one day eat cake!!!!